Posted in Humor, Poetry, Uncategorized

Lorraine In Love

TRAIN ENGINEER CARTOON -- OPEN CLIPART

There once was a girl named Loraine
Who was wild for engineers of trains.
They could be short or tall;
Loraine just loved them all;
To have one for her own was her aim.

Now, the guys who drove trains all agreed
That Loraine was no prize; no indeed;
So precautions they’d take,
Each to make his escape
When Loraine for a date came to plead.

Then a young engineer came to town
Who was clueless when she came around.
He became so beguiled
When right at him she smiled,
That right then on one knee he went down.

Oh the wedding was really a beut.
On a honeymoon now they’re enroute.
As they sit side by side
Engineer and his bride.
Down the tracks, at full throttle, they scoot.

There’s a moral to this little tale:
That a woman in love never fails.
If she’s made up her mind
And she’s true to her kind,
It’s the end for those poor, helpless males.

 

 


 

Posted in Humor, Inspiration, Poetry, Uncategorized

Candy Love

VALENTINE CANDY HEARTS

I just can’t seem to tell him how I feel.
Hearing myself say the words
Makes it seem so real.
And if he doesn’t feel the same for me,
It would be an unhappy fate
That spoken words would seal.

So what to do about it I’m unsure.
I’ve thought of possibilities
But nothing quite secure.
But wait! I’ve found the answer to my need:
I’ll say it with some candy hearts —
So childlike, sweet, and pure.

 

 

 


 

Posted in Humor, Poetry, Tso'i Poetry, Uncategorized

Sardines Swimming Upstream – Tso’i

metro escalator -- tama - px

Going up?
We’re squeezed in pretty tight.
A claustrophobic feeling threatens to erupt.
We’re sardines in a can:
All sealed up.

 

(If you’re not familiar yet with this new poetic form that I created last year, you’ll find information about it at this link. Maybe you’d like to try writing Tso’i yourself.  If you do, feel free to leave a link to your poem in the “Comments” section below.)

 


photo courtesy of Tama66 @pixabay.com

 

 

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Posted in Humor, Inspiration, Poetry, Uncategorized

Primal Urge

polka dot notebook

I have a little note pad, new, with polka dots.
Teal green with border shiny gold and golden spots.
And since I’m one who writes to live and lives to write,
As soon as I beheld it, ’twas love at first sight.

There’s something mystical about a virgin page.
And notebooks filled with pages pure my soul engage.
It’s calling me, this tablet with gold polka dots.
But subject matter — what to write — I know not what.

Frustratedly, I sit here, holding pen in hand,
Seeking words to start a poem — something grand.
This primal urge to slather ink across the page
Is in control ’til its demands I can assuage.

It could take hours, or even days, but what care I?
So many times I’ve let whole days go drifting by,
Until my muse and I fin’ly came into sync,
And thus inspired, I filled each pristine page with ink.

 

 

 

 


 

Posted in Humor, Poetry, Uncategorized

Solving Crime From My Armchair

MAGNIFYING GLASS, FOOTPRINTS CREDITS

 

I love a good “who-done-it”
For my reading time.
Mystery on a light scale —
Not obnoxious crime.

A cozy mystery fits my
Laid-back frame of mind.
I have to think a little —
When I feel inclined.

I’m quite a good detective
Sitting in my chair.
So villains in the fiction world
Now had best beware.

In fact, I’m now so good
The mysteries to unwind
I’ve put my application in
Down at precinct nine.

 

 


 

Posted in Humor, Poetry, Uncategorized

Eating Fish Will Increase Your IQ

 

WHITE FISH - YELLOW TAILS

The most intelligent animal is a fish.
And I’m so proud to say that I am one.
To merit such acclaim all others wish,
But fish win out when all is said and done.

How do I know my claims are proven fact,
Especially since there are no written rules?
Why, others live in herds and flocks and packs,
But fish have brains enough to live in schools.*
___________________________________________________

*Before a fish is allowed to graduate from college, he must memorize the entire text of Moby Dick. It’s part of the curriculum that teaches the fish species’ superiority to man.

 

 

 


 

Posted in Humor, Poetry, Uncategorized

Garbage Day Meditation

GARBAGE TRUCK - Netkid -- PX

The garbage truck has come and gone,
My empty cans roll to and fro.
I need to go out to the street
And haul them back where they should go.
It won’t be long until I’ve placed
A few more bags of trash within.
And next week, once again, I’ll roll
Them to the curb for the truck again.
I’m not alone in this pursuit;
My neighbors, they are all like me.
And every week in every town,
We feed the garbage truck faithfully.
It seems there’s just no way to live
Without creating tons of trash.
And what becomes of all that stuff
Is something I don’t want to ask.
I find, though, that I worry some
That years and years of garbage days
Might heap the trash so deep and high
That Earth just might get thrown away.

 


photo courtesy of Netkid @ pixabay.com

 

 

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Posted in Humor, Poetry, Uncategorized

Love Ditty

OLD COUPLE ON BENCH - ErikaWittlief -- PXLove is a giggle.

Love is a sigh.

Love makes you wiggle.

Love makes you high.

Lovin’ makes me hungry.

Lovin’ makes me glad.

When love is unfaithful.

Love makes me mad.

Love’s not for wimps.

Love’s for the bold.

Love’s good when young.

Love’s better when old.

 

 


photo courtesy of ErikaWittleib @ pixabay.com

 

 

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Posted in Humor, Poetry, Uncategorized

Easy Lovin’

1950'S COUPLE -- Jo-B -- PXCome away with me
To an intimate place.
I’ve kisses to spare
And an ardent embrace.
No, wait! You’re the wrong guy;
I just saw your face.
From the back you looked like him,
But I spoke in haste.
But, heck, why not wait here;
You know — just in case.
If he doesn’t show up,
You can just take his place.

 


I know: it lacks class. But I was just in one of those moods.  🙂

≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈
graphics: Jo-B @ pixabay.com

 

 

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Posted in Humor, Inspiration, Poetry, Uncategorized

A Whale of a Tale

Another old one that I dug out this week and decided to share on this newest site.
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SMILING WHALE - WHITE ON AQUA

There’s a whale of a tale I could tell you,
But I don’t know if you’ll think it’s true.
It’s the story of one man named Jonah,
Who did something we should never do.

Long ago in a Mid-Eastern country,
He was given a mission by God.
But Jonah, after thinking it over,
Decided that he’d rather not.

So … he jumped on a ship going elsewhere,
Thinking from the great God he could hide.
That was stupid, of course, ’cause we all know:
God sees all and knows what’s inside.

Soon, alas, a great storm hit the old ship,
And the sailors were panicked with fear.
When, at last, Jonah stood to face his fate,
It was without shedding a tear.

Overboard then the sailors did throw him,
And for a quick end he did wish.
But instead a big whale gulped him right down,
As if he were a regular fish.

What to do, what to do, he did wonder,
Sloshing ’round in the digestive juice.
But it didn’t take long, as he pondered,
To decide that he’d better pray through.

So he called out to God in repentance,
And he worshiped Creator most high.
Then when God heard his plea, He had mercy;
Told the whale, “Spit him out high and dry.”

Then old Jonah, much wiser by this time,
Set off quickly to do what God bid.
And the story turned out satisfactorily,
But he never went fishing again.


Based on the book of Jonah, Holy Bible

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Posted in Humor, Poetry, Uncategorized

Just a Little Whimsy for a Busy Day

UPSET WOMAN

 

There’s just too much to do.
Much too much to do.
How can I see it through?
It’s making me feel blue.

In truth, I’ll have to say
That I’d just rather play.
On such a busy day,
Why would I feel this way?

I do procrastinate.
I’d like to think it’s fate.
But, actu’lly, I’m just late.
Why do I let stuff wait???

The clock is ticking on,
And most of morning’s gone.
Get busy, Sandra, hon.
And get your dang stuff done!!!

 

 


 

Posted in Humor, Poetry, Uncategorized

I Think I’ll Write A Poem

(This piece is one I wrote years ago, but I feel like giving it a fresh airing.)

 

cartoon-writer-pink-spikey-hair-2.jpgI think I’ll write a poem …
Type, type, type …
Words, words, words …

‘Twill have to be a story …
Type, type, type …
Words, words, words …

No … I guess a novel …
Type, type, type …
Words, words, words …

A saga will be better …
Type, type, type …
Words, words, words …

A trilogy is called for …
Type, type, type …
Words, words, words …

My editor now reads it …
Delete, delete, delete …
Delete, delete, delete …

I have a two-line stanza.

 

 


 

 

Posted in Daily Post Prompt, Humor, Inspiration, Poetry, Uncategorized

Is That Really Me???

I’ve been looking at some old photos recently, and I find myself astonished — and a tad depressed — by how much has changed — as evidenced by my mirror this morning, as well as some more recent photos. But I decided that the trade off for having lived this long is probably worth it. So I also decided to have some fun with today’s DP prompt: astonish.
ME - VALENTINE PIC - SEPIA - CROPPED

My skin is not as tight, my hair not quite so brown;
I’m not as photogenic as before.
I’ve added a few pounds, with bulges here and there,
And now can count my age in terms of scores.
But when I  contemplate all that I’ve learned of life,
The wisdom gained that leads to peace and rest,
The  understanding of myself and others too,
I have to say that I am richly blessed.
And even though I wince a little now and then
When looking at old photos that I’ve saved,
I’d say it’s worth some wrinkles and some extra pounds
To have lived and loved as largely as I have.

 

 


 

 

 

 

Posted in Daily Post Prompt, Humor, Poetry, Uncategorized

To Throw – Or Not To Throw – A Tantrum

ANGRY WOMAN

Throwing tantrums doesn’t help at all.
I kick and scream and yell and cuss and squall.
But somehow all the energy infused
Just leaves me feeling even more abused.
For even though I give it all my best,
And, surely I’d win any tantrum test,
Still, tantrums never get me anywhere.
I guess it’s because no one seems to care.
The purpose of good tantrums is the show;
Without an audience, success is low.
To throw a tantrum’s useless in my view,
For no one pays attention when I do.


Daily Post Prompt: Tantrum

 

 

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