Elmer Jenkins went to buy a di’mond ring
For Pearly Jane, the girl who filled his loving heart.
But then he learned that Pearly’d been seen sev’ral times
Parked with Curly Miller, sparking after dark.
The news, it stabbed at Elmer’s heart like sharp-edged knife,
And all his will to live just seemed to ebb away.
But then he said, “Why should I sit and mourn and cry,
When I could just put Curly Miller right away?”
He thought about the heavy problem day and night –
‘Bout how he best could bring about Curly’s demise.
He didn’t hunt, so had no gun, and truth be told,
He couldn’t bring himself to use a bloody knife.
“But wait,” he finally said, “why should I kill the man?
For, after all he’s been a benefit to me.
A one-man woman isn’t in ol’ Pearly’s heart.
Let Curly have her. There’s a better life for me.”
And sad, but true, ol’ Curly didn’t see the light,
But married Pearly Jane before the end of year.
Now friends can find him every night in Henry’s bar,
Trying to drown his sorrows in the foamy beer.
photo courtesy of Alexas_Fotos @ pixabay.com